Commencement

23rd of June 2016 was the biggest highlight of my life.

It was the most amazing experience I have ever had the opportunity to receive and I can’t feel ever more blessed than I ever had. I brought my family along with me to Dublin so that they can witness me being conferred my degree. The degree for which I put a lot of hard work, tears and sweat into. The degree for which I fought hard for. I’ve never wanted to do this so badly before in my life.

It was a choice I made personally and one I will never ever regret making. I started later than my friends because I wanted to save up so much so I can do this degree with financial stability in mind. I worked hard for an additional year and restricted my spending so I could save so much that I needn’t worry about not having money to pay for tuition or for my own expenses. I saved up so much so my parents wouldn’t have to worry about selling the house or the car to pay for my education.

Thankfully, with the assistance I have received so far, and the subsidies from the government, I only needed to pay a fraction of my tuition fees and the rest were my allowance for the 9 months I would be away from work.

Because I didn’t have to worry about this, I could study without distraction. And I surpassed my own expectations having been conferred Honores Primae Classis (Honors of the First Class) at the commencement.

The ceremony was simple yet so beautiful. I could remember every single second of it. From the introduction of what and how the ceremony will be conducted, to conferring of my degree, signing of the Graduates list on the book of records and finally, the procession at the end where we walked out of the hall and into the Front Square, parading with pride and our certificates in hand. Proud parents and family members, students passing by and tourists and onlookers stopped in their tracks as we walked past them. We are proud Graduates of Trinity College and I was ecstatic to be present right there and then; to witness and to be part of the tradition.

Trinity College Dublin Summer Commencement 2016. Date: 23 June 2016.

I am so thankful to a lot of people who have guided me, motivated me, understood me and listened to my troubles as I went through those difficult 9 months.

My family, who always knows I’m trying my best and accepts my results whatever it is.
My classmates, who are always on hand to answer my never-ending doubts and calm my worries.
My good friend, who had so much faith in me and kept on insisting I could make it with First Class even though I highly doubted myself and was more than happy to even achieve a Second Class. 

I will always remember how much they play a part in my life at this stage. And I will always remember their sacrifices and their words to get me where I am today. I really would not have made through without all of them by my side. ♥

All of you are so precious to me.

A Fresh Graduate, 
Nur

The Next Door

Edinburgh, Scotland. Visited: November 2015.

Kim Dong Shik: I think we keep opening doors our whole lives, instead of either succeeding or failing.
Jang Geu Rae: Then, what is success?
Kim Dong Shik: Wouldn’t it depend on the meaning you give to that moment? 

Kim Dong Shik: Sometimes, there are contracts you couldn’t seal that makes you feel fulfilled. Would you still classify that as a failure?

– Misaeng: The Incomplete Life

My undergraduate life ended on 20 May 2016.
Results were published on 31st May 2016.
My Trinity student card also expired the same day.

I am finally a graduate after 8 months of reading, analysing and critiquing journals, and writing essays more so than I have ever did in my entire life as a student in Singapore. The experience in Trinity was the most difficult to date; having so little lectures to attend and way too many off-days for independent learning. This really tested our ability to stay focused the entire journey to the point it drove some of my classmates into a black hole.

Did I succeed going through this door? I feel that I did.

I exceeded my own expectations surprisingly. My results were something I thought I would never have been able to achieve when I started this last September. I would not have been able to go through this experience without the support of my friends and my family members. Being a slightly older undergraduate student compared to the rest of the class because of circumstances, I was intimidated at how I felt that everyone else was smarter than I am. I guess the hard work paid off this time round.

It wasn’t just any hard work.
It was a hard work filled with quantity and quality and constant prayers.

Now that I’ve passed through this, what’s next? Work is waiting for me to return. Definitely, I will return to work since I have an institutional bond to pay back.

But, what door will I open next?

I think I will need time to think through that. I have thoughts of taking it up a notch with a Masters but I really don’t know what’s in store for me in the near future. Maybe the door of marriage will be ready, or maybe I’ll be changing my workplace, maybe I’ll move, maybe I’ll stay.

One thing’s for sure,
whatever choice I make, whatever results it gives me,
I will not regret it.

Sincerely,
Nur

Countdown

The reason for March’s absence.

An out-of-format post because I really needed to put this up to remind myself of how much I have gone through in March to the point that an email I just received from my supervisor about my Thesis made me cry – a good cry.

March has been busy. Although I spent less than half of March in college attending lessons, the other half was spent at home doing Thesis and revising for my last college exam that ended on the 24th.

Doing both simultaneously was no easy feat. In fact, I found myself spending 70% of my time on Thesis and only 30% on revision. Up until 2 days before the exam, I was still typing out my Thesis because our formative feedback was due the day before the exam. I was up till 2-3 o’clock in the morning just to get my Thesis ready for submission and spent the rest of the next 1/2 days trying to memorise and understand whatever material I could in preparation for the exam.

It was mad rush. I kept telling myself I should have prepared earlier but I realised there was no way I could have prepared anything earlier. I had already done my best. And the rest are in The Almighty’s hands. Whether I do well, or just barely passed the examination.. I will have to wait until the results are released.

You can tell I really spent a whole lot of my time on Thesis. That was why when I received this feedback email from my supervisor, I felt that everything was worth it, somehow. Thesis plays a big part of my one and only precious undergraduate honours year which is why I try really hard to make sure the work I produce is of a reasonable quality that my supervisor expects of me.

My favourite sentence of all was the last sentence in her email.

I look forward to us being able to submit this piece for a review article in the near future.

Because that was one of my major goals when I embarked on this journey. I looked up to my seniors who have graduated from this course and whose thesis have been published for people in our industry and the world to read. It’s not because I am interested in a research track or career, but it just gives me a sense of accomplishment that the work and the effort I’ve put in for this has been recognised by my college. It’s like I’ve made my mark.

That’s how I feel. That’s why this is so important to me.

× Nur